PADUCAH, KY -- Matt Johnson, an employee at Paradigm Shift Consulting, Inc.,
was fired from his programming job because of his addiction to Slashdot.
Johnson typically visited Slashdot several times a day during working hours.
Citing productivity problems, Johnson's boss gave him the pink slip and
instituted a 'NoDot' policy -- no visiting Slashdot or related sites from the
office, ever. Now Johnson has filed a lawsuit, claiming that his Slashdot
addiction is protected by the Americans With Disabilities Act.
Matt Johnson explained, "They discriminated against me because I'm a Dothead.
Drug abuse and alcoholism are often considered handicaps. Why not Slashdot
addiction?" Johnson's boss sees the situation differently. "Matt never got
any work done. He was always visiting Slashdot, Freshmeat, or some other
nerd website. And when he wasn't, he suffered withdrawl symptoms and
couldn't think straight. A few months ago he spent eight consecutive hours
posting comments in a KDE vs. GNOME flame war. I tried to offer assistance
to overcome his addiction, but he refused. Enough is enough."
The company's 'NoDot' policy has been under fire as well. One anonymous
employee said, "We can't visit Slashdot because of Matt's addiction. This
just sucks. I really don't see anything wrong with visiting Slashdot during
breaks or after hours."
Dave Finton gazes into his crystal ball...
January 2099 Rob Malda Finally Gets His Damned Nano-Technology
The Linux hacker community finally breathed a collective sigh of relief
when it was announced that Rob Malda finally got his damned
nanotechnology....
