Related:

• The Roseanne Barr Diet: One meadow per day.
• One thing men can do better than women: read a map.
  Men read maps better. 'Cause only a male mind could conceive of one inch equaling 100 miles....
• A good man doesn't just happen. They have to be created by us women.
  A guy is a lump like a doughnut. So, first you gotta get rid of all the stuff his mom did to him....
• When I 'm not thank'd at all, I 'm thank'd enough; I 've done my duty, and I 've done no more.
  -- Henry Fielding (1707-1754) -- Tom Thumb the Great, Act i, Sc. 3...
• Roseanne Arnold -- Shannon Doherty before Ultra Slimfast.
• My only books Were woman's looks,-- And folly 's all they 've taught me.
  -- Thomas Moore (1779-1852) -- The Time I 've lost in wooing...
• I 've often wish'd that I had clear, For life, six hundred pounds a yea
  A handsome house to lodge a friend; A river at my garden's end...
• I 've wandered east, I 've wandered west, Through many a weary way
  But never, never can forget The love of life's young day....
• You can't be a figment of my imagination--I'd have done a better job.