Related:

• Always distrust offices not under your jurisdiction which say that they are there to serve you.
  Support" offices in a bureaucracy tend to grow in size and make demands on you out of proportion to their service and in the end require more effort on your part than their service is worth....
• LaForge: "Q, I've got a few people down on Bre'el IV who are going to be hurt!
  Q: "Yes, yes, yes! Your marvelous plan will not only tear the moon to pieces, but your precious ship as well!...
• MONASH UNIVERSITY COMPUTER CENTRE - MODEM DIAL-UP SERVICES Users of the Greater Monash University can now access the computer systems via modems 24 hours except when they are out of order.
  All four campuses are equipped with dial-in lines which under normal circumstances should be either engaged or not operational....
• You can tell it's going to be a rotten day when You call your answering service and they've never heard of you.
• If you are going to throw your weight around, you ought first to join an aerobics class, so you get something from your effort.
• You think things are going well for you, do you? Things could change.
• Congratulations! You have purchased an extremely fine device that would give you thousands of years of trouble-free service
  except that you undoubtably will destroy it via some typical bonehead consumer maneuver....