Related:

• I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being only skin-deep.
  That's deep enough. What do you want--an adorable pancreas? -- Jean Ke...
• Hope is the feeling you have that the feeling you have isn't permanent. -- Jean Ke
• Laura's mother: Well, I know what you're thinking, and the answer is yes.
  I want to be fixed up with one of your friends as soon as you can arrange it....
• The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old.
  -- Jean Ke...
• 1. If no one sees you eat it, it has no calories. 2.
  If you drink a diet soda and a candy bar, these two items will automatically cancel each other out....
• The next time I have meat and mashed potatoes, I think I'll put a very large blob of potatoes on my plate with just a little piece of meat.
  And if someone asks me why I didn't get more meat, I'll just say, "Oh, you mean this?...
• You tried it just for once, found it alright for kicks, but now you find out you have a habit that sticks, you're an orgasm addict, you're always at it, and you're an orgasm addict.
  -- The Buzzcock...
• One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about human beings was their habit of continually stating and repeating the obviou
  as in It's a nice day, or You're very tall, or Oh dear you seem to have fallen down a thirty-foot well, are you alright?...