Related:

• I got my driver's license photo taken out of focus on purpose.
  Now when I get pulled over the cop looks at it (moving it nearer and farther, trying to see it clearly)....
• I got my driver's license photo taken out of focus on purpose.
  Now when I get pulled over the cop looks at it [moving it nearer and farther, trying to see it clearly]....
• The other night I came home late, and tried to unlock my house with my car keys.
  I started the house up. So, I drove it around for a while....
• One time a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign.
  He said, "Didn't you see the stop sign?" I said, "Yeah, but I don't believe everything I read....
• I got pulled over by a cop, and he said, 'do you know the speed limit here is 50 miles per hour?
  '. So I said, 'oh, that's OK, I'm not going that far.'. -- Stephen Wrigh...
• I didn't get a toy train like the other kids. I got a toy subway instead.
  You couldn't see anything, but every now and then you'd hear this rumbling noise go by....
• Skinner: Bart! Heh heh, welcome. Can I offer you a Diet Caffeine-Free Dr.
  Pepper or an individual fruit cocktail cup? Ba...
• I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now.
  But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." -- Steven Wrigh...
• One time a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign.
  He said "Didn't you see the stop sign." I said "Yeah, but I don't believe everything I read....