Related:

• Singles Solution Department: When jogging close to a beautiful lady, you pull up next to her and say "Your pace or mine?
  (I deeply regret this, really, but it had to come out, it couldn't stay with me, I can't stand this type of thing, please accept my apology!...
• I hate the subway. And these guys begging for spare change.
  They come around with their hand out yelling, "Spare a quarter!...
• Lincoln: Four score and seven years ago, our forefathers brewed a refreshing drink from hops and barley.
  [drinks his Duff and starts beatboxing] We-e-ll, I'm Rappin' A....
• I say stay away from the miserable people, because misery does love company.
  Just look at a fly strip. You never see a fly stuck there saying, "Go around!...
• As a kid, I used to have a lemonade stand. The sign said, "All you can drink for a dime.
  So some kid would come up, plunk down the dime, drink a glass, and then say, "Refill it....
• Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money? -- Pick up line
• I never got along with my dad. Kids used to come up to me and say, "My dad can beat up your dad.
  I'd say yeah? When? -- Bill Hick...
• Let me see what I can come up with for you
• Krusty: Ah, there's nothing better than a cigarette.
  ..unless it's a cigarette lit with a $100 bill!...