Related:

• Yeah, I've got a pool table, but it's all wet. And no diving board.
• You know you should be swimming when . . . You keep crashing into the wall at the swimming pool and won't go near the diving boards.
• I just installed airbags in my car.
• Beverly: "If I remember correctly, the last time you graced my Sickbay, you were diving off the Cliffs of Heaven on Sumico IV, Holodeck Program Forty-Seven C.
  Kristin: "Same thing, only that time I flattened out when I should've tucked....
• I used to be normal, then I joined this conference!
• Marge: Look what I got! Now people will stop intentionally ramming our car.
  -- Marge buys a "Baby On Board" sign, "Homer's Barbershop Quarte...
• I joined scientology at a garage sale!! -- Zippy the Pinhead
• I like driving around with my two dogs, especially on the freeways.
  I make them wear little hats so I can use the car-pool lanes. -- Monica Pipe...
• We just joined the civil hair patrol! -- Zippy the Pinhead