Related:

• Herb: Now I bet you're all wondering what lies under this sheet.
  Bart: Not really. We snuck a peek while you were in the john....
• You 're our enemy; lead the way, and we 'll precede.
  -- Richard Brinsley Sheridan (1751-1816) -- The Rivals, Act v, Sc. 1...
• Ah, yes! I wrote the "Purple Cow"-- I'm sorry now I wrote it!
  But I can tell you anyhow, I'll kill you if you quote it!...
• Time travels in divers paces with divers persons. I 'll tell you who Time ambles withal, who Time trots withal, who Time gallops withal, and who he stands still withal.
  -- William Shakespeare (1564-1616), As You Like It -- Act iii, Sc. 2...
• All persons, living or dead, are purely coincidental, and should not be construed.
  -- Kurt Vonnegut 117. A faithful dog will always stay with you And laugh with you --or cry-- He'll gladly starve to stay with you Nor ever reason why....
• Did you hear about the dislexic agnostic insomniac who stays up all night wondering if there really is a Dog?
• Ned: I can't do it, Maude. I can't face their accusing eyes!
  Maude: Oh, don't worry, Ned. This is a house of love and forgiveness....
• I was wondering if I might have the afternoon off? Well, of course not.
  Who do you think you are...Watt Tyler? You can have the afternoon off when you _die_, Baldrick, not before....
• If I were a gambling man, I would bet that you read this.