Related:

• I broke up with my psychiatrist. I told him I had suicidal tendencies.
  He told me from now on I had to pay in advance. -- Rodney Dangerfield...
• If it ain't fixed, don't broke it!
• My cat had puppies, so I spayed the cricket.
• I BOOTED my computer. Broke my toe!
• If a stud cat gets fixed, it's broken.
• I broke my Window and saw OS/2.
• I took my cat in for a catscan. Diagnosis? It was a cat.
• Bart: Who names these things [the constellations] anyway?
  Skinner: Whoever discovers them. I've been hoping I could find something that would be named after me....
• My ex-boyfriend's a cat lover. I sent him a Kzin for his birthday.