Related:

• This yuppie, see, was in a car wreck. His BMW was mangled, and so was he.
  The paramedic was leaning over him getting his vitals, and all the yup could groan was "My BMW!...
• Called a blind date to set up a meeting at a restaurant.
  I said, "I'll be the one driving the Mercedes and wearing a Rolex....
• My lawyer can beat up your lawyer!
• Obedience. A religion of slaves. A religion of intellectual death.
  I like it. Don't ask questions, don't think, obey the Word of the Lord -- as it has been conveniently brought to you by a man in a Rolls with a heavy Rolex on his wrist....
• Please, cut off my arm.
• I'll never discuss my lawyer's character in his absence, so let's discuss his absence of character!
  -- Michael Lara...
• One day a gate breaks down between heaven and hell.
  So St. Peter arrives on the scene and calls out for the devil....
• Over my head his arm he flung Against the world.
  -- Robert Browning (1812-1890) -- Count Gismond, xix...
• An excellence-oriented '80s male does not wear a regular watch.
  He wears a Rolex watch, because it weighs nearly six pounds and is advertised only in excellence-oriented publications such as Fortune and Rich Protestant Golfer Magazine....