Related:

• ABSOLUTE, adj. Independent, irresponsible. An absolute monarchy is one in which the sovereign does as he pleases so long as he pleases the assassins.
  Not many absolute monarchies are left, most of them having been replaced by limited monarchies, where the sovereign's power for evil (and for good) is greatly curtailed, and by republics, which are governed by chance....
• LAWFUL, adj. Compatible with the will of a judge having jurisdiction.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• CONSUL, n. In American politics, a person who having failed to secure and office from the people is given one by the Administration on condition that he leave the country.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• BOTTLE-NOSED, adj. Having a nose created in the image of its maker.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• FRIENDLESS, adj. Having no favors to bestow. Destitute of fortune.
  Addicted to utterance of truth and common sense. -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• HOUSELESS, adj. Having paid all taxes on household goods.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• MAGNIFICENT, adj. Having a grandeur or splendor superior to that to which the spectator is accustomed, as the ears of an ass, to a rabbit, or the glory of a glowworm, to a maggot.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• INEXPEDIENT, adj. Not calculated to advance one's interests.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• Truthful, adj.: Dumb and illiterate. -- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary