Related:

• Bart: Hey, Dad. What's the word with Planet Crackpot?
  Homer: Oh, I suppose _you're_ going to mock me, too!...
• Homer: [folding a balloon incompetently] And then, take that.
  ..and... put that in there, and you...ah!...
• Bart: Dad, maybe you should do this. Homer: Son, it's no different than the time I let you vote for me.
  Remember that absentee ballot?...
• Homer: Look, Adil, you can call me `Dad'. Adil: All right.
  .. `Dad'. Homer: Awwww, you called me `Dad'. -- "The Crepes of Wrath...
• Father: Son, it's time we talked about sex. Son: Sure, Dad, what do you want to know?
• Homer: Dad! Abe: Son! Homer: I'm a screw-up. I burned down our house.
  Abe: No, I'm a screw-up. _I_ burned down our house....
• Marge: You know, <we'll> be old someday. Homer: Gasp!
  My God, you're right, Marge! You kids wouldn't put me in a home like I did to my dad, would you?...
• Homer: [yawns] Oh, it's great to be indoors with my family.
  Lisa: I'm really glad you're back, Dad. I knew you could do it....
• Skinner: All right, first academic alert: Wiggum, Ralph.
  Ralph: I won, I won! [walks on stage] Skinner: No no, Ralph, this means you're failing English....