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READ THIS BEFORE OPENING PACKAGE: According To Certain Suggested Versions Of The Grand Unified Theory
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READ THIS BEFORE OPENING PACKAGE: According to Certain Suggested Versions of
the Grand Unified Theory, the Primary Particles Constituting this Product May
Decay to Nothingness Within the Next Four Hundred Million Years.
Related:
The Manufacturer May Technically Be Entitled to Claim That This Product Is TenDimensional.
However, the Consumer Is Reminded That This Confers No Legal Rights Above and Beyond Those Applicable to Three-Dimensional Objects, Since the Seven New Dimensions Are "Rolled Up" into Such a Small "Area" That They Cannot Be Detected....
HANDLE WITH EXTREME CARE: This Product Contains Minute Electrically Charged Particles Moving at Velocities in Excess of Five Hundred Million Miles Per Hour.
Read enclosed instructions carefully before opening.
HONEYMOON -- the grand opening of Beaver Dam.
We're all nothing but unified arrangements of atoms and particle
drifting around, enjoying consciousness every now and then for a second or so before splitting up to become bits and pieces of trees and stars and french fries....
May a hundred thousand midgets invade your home singing cheezy lounge-lizard versions of songs from The Wizard of Oz.
PREVENT MIND DECAY - READ BOOKS
According to the Theory of Dubious Theories...
vaxocentrism /vak`soh-sen'trizm/ n. [analogy with `ethnocentrism'] A notional disease said to afflict C programmers who persist in coding according to certain assumptions that are valid (esp.
under Unix) on VAXen but false elsewhere. Among these are...