Related:

• Real programmers don't write in COBOL. COBOL is for wimpy applications programmers.
• Real Programmers don't write in PL/I. PL/I is for programmers who can't decide whether to write in COBOL or FORTRAN.
• Real programmers don't write in PL/I. PL/I is for gutless people who can't decide whether they want COBOL or FORTRAN.
• Real programmers don't write in APL, unless the whole program can be written in one line.
• COBOL: /koh'bol/ [COmmon Business-Oriented Language] n.
  (Synonymous with {evil}.) A weak, verbose, and flabby language used by {card walloper}s to do boring mindless things on {dinosaur} mainframes....
• Real programmers don't program in LISP. Any language with more parenthesis than actual code is for airheaded wienies who can't write real programs.
• COBOL /koh'bol/ n. [COmmon Business-Oriented Language] (Synonymous with evil.
  ) A weak, verbose, and flabby language used by card wallopers to do boring mindless things on dinosaur mainframes....