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• Many years ago a very wise man named Bernard Baruch took me aside and put his arm around my shoulder.
  Harpo my boy," he said, "I'm going to give you three pieces of advice, three things you should always remember....
• A pig on a mountain sees more than a wise man with a bag over his head.
• While passing a vacant lot late one night, a jogger was stopped by a man who held a gun to his head.
  "Who are you for," the gunman snarled, "Bush or Dukakis?...
• Grandma: Well, there's my ride. The underground awaits.
  Homer: [sniffles] At least this time, I'm awake for your goodbye....
• If men are not afraid to die, it is of no avail to threaten them with death.
  If men live in constant fear of dying, And if breaking the law means a man will be killed, Who will dare to break the law?...
• A worthless wise man always charms the rabble.
• Rush Limbaugh: The whale that walks like a man!
• No man is wise enough to be another man's master. Each man's as good as the next--if not a damn sight better.
  -- Edward Abbey...
• The wise man's eyes are in his head; but the fool walketh in darkne
  and I myself perceived also that one event happeneth to them all....