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• When your life flashes before you, do you think that includes every trip you made to the bank?
  -- Carol Leife...
• Whenever I travel I like to keep the seat next to me empty.
  I found a great way to do it. When someone walks down the aisle and says to you, "Is someone sitting there?...
• Love is so much better when you are not married.
• The thing to do is to make so much money that you don't have to work after the age of twenty- seven.
  In case this is impracticable, stop work at the earliest possible moment, even if it is a quarter past eleven in the morning of the day when you find you have enough money....
• I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain. -- Carol Leife
• It's slim pickings out there. When you're first single, you're so optimistic.
  At the beginning, you're like: I want to meet a guy who's really smart, really sweet, really good-looking, has a really great career ....
• When you see someone across the room and suddenly know for a fact that he's the most wonderful man on earth, you've got instant lust on your hands.
  Something about the way his tie is knotted is infinitely intriguing to you, and the swell of his bicep causes inner turmoil....
• Eleven reasons a cucumber is better than a man: (1) Cucumbers can stay up all night, and you won't have to sleep in the wet spot.
  (2) Cucumbers don't play the guitar and try to find themselves....
• Sex is like snow; you never know how many inches you are going to get or how long it is going to last.
  -- Murphy's laws on sex...