Tips for aliens in New York:
Land anywhere. Central Park, anywhere. No one will care or indeed
even notice.
Surviving: get a job as a cabdriver immediately. A cabdriver's job
is to drive people anywhere they want to go in big yellow machines
called taxis. Don't worry if you don't know how the machine works and
you can't speak the language, don't understand the geography or indeed
the basic physics of the area, and have large green antennae growing out
of your head. Believe me, this is the best way of staying
inconspicuous.
If your body is REALLY weird, try showing it to people in the streets
for money.
Amphibious life forms from any of the worlds in the Swulling, Noxios,
or Nausalia systems will particularly enjoy the East River, which is
said to be richer in those lovely life-giving nutrients than the finest
and most virulent laboratory slime yet achieved.
Having fun: this is the big section. It is impossible to have more
fun without electrocuting your pleasure center....
-- Douglas Adams, "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"
The beach was a beach we shall not name, because his private house
was there but it was a small sandy stretch somewhere along the hundreds
of miles of coastline that runs west from Los Angeles, which is
described in the new edition of "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"
in one entry as "junky, wunky, lunky, stunky, and what's that other
word, and all kinds of bad stuff, woo," and in another, written only
hours later as "being like several thousand square miles of American
Express junk mail, but without the same sense of moral depth....
