Related:

• What would a Chtorran get if it ate the President? Heartburn.
• What would a Chtorran get if it ate Congress? The President's personal thanks.
• What would a Chtorran get if it ate the Vice-President? Our deepest sympathies.
• Any red-blooded, flag-fearing American would love the M-320.
  Celebrate the independence of your nation by blowing up a small part of it....
• If you have a weak candidate and a weak platform, wrap yourself up in the American flag and talk about the Constitution.
  -- Matthew S. Quay...
• I'll tell you what I know, then," he decided. "The pin I'm wearing means I'm a member of the IA.
  That's Inamorati Anonymous. An inamorato is somebody in love....
• Homer: Bart, I want you to shake hands with -- what's your name, fella?
  Roscoe: Roscoe. Homer: Roscoe here runs this mill....
• BASIC is to PASCAL what AMERICAN is to ENGLISH.
• Q. What's the capital of Canada? A. American.