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Your Husband Is Lazy If: When He Leaves The House, He Finds Out Which Way The Wind Is Blowing And Goes In That Direction.
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Your husband is lazy if:
When he leaves the house, he finds out which way the wind is blowing and
goes in that direction.
His idea of dressing for dinner is wearing a necktie over his pajamas.
Coffee doesn't keep him awake--even when it's hot and being spilled on him.
-- Phyllis Diller
Related:
Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
I'll go into the bushes over there, make a lot of noise, and flush out a rabbit.
When he comes out, you step on him....
Richard, in being so fierce toward my vampire, you were doing what you wanted to do, even though you thought it was going to hurt somebody else.
He even told you he'd be hurt if..." "He was going to suck my blood!...
Lenny: See, all along I've been telling Carl I'm married to a beauty queen.
Now, he's coming over for dinner. Marge: Oh, Lenny, I'm sure he'll like your wife no matter what she looks like....
Florence Flask was ... dressing for the opera when she turned to her husband and screamed, "Erlenmeyer!
My joules! Someone has stolen my joules!" "Now, now, my dear," replied her husband, "keep your balance and reflux a moment....
Without coffee he could not work, or at least he could not have worked in the way he did.
In addition to paper and pens, he took with him everywhere as an indispensable article of equipment the coffee machine, which was no less important to him than his table or his white robe....
A bank robber hits the biggest bank in LA. He's planned this heist for years and everything goes like clockwork
but as he's running out of the bank he notices one security camera aimed right at him....