Related:

• Nobert Weiner was the subject of many dotty professor stories.
  Weiner was, in fact, very absent minded. The following story is told about him...
• A feed salesman is on his way to a farm. As he's driving along at forty m.
  p.h., he looks out his car window and sees a three-legged chicken running alongside him, keeping pace with his car....
• A New Yorker was driving through Berkeley when he saw a big crowd gathered by the side of the street.
  Curiousity got the better of him and he leaned out of his window to ask an onlooker what was going on....
• The old man had lived all his life in a little house on the Vermont side of the New Hampshire-Vermont border.
  One day, the surveyors came to inform him that they had just discovered that he lived in New Hampshire, not Vermont....
• Richard Nixon was the most dishonest individual I have ever met in my life.
  He lied to his wife, his family, his friends, his colleagues in the Congress, lifetime members of his own political party, the American people, and the world....
• A farmer decides that his three sows should be bred, and contacts a buddy down the road, who owns several boars.
  They agree on a stud fee, and the farmer puts the sows in his pickup and takes them down the road to the boars....
• Let me tell you who the actual "front-runners" are.
  On one side, you have George Bush, who is currently going through a sort of fraternity hazing wherein he has to perform a series of humiliating stunts to win the approval of the Republican Right....
• Vice-President Hubert Humphrey's loquacity is legendary, and Barry Goldwater notes that "Hubert has been clocked at 275 words a minute with gusts up to 340.
  On the campaign trail during 1964, Republican nominee Barry Goldwater stated, "The immediate task before us is to cut the Federal Government down to size....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...