1. A beer won't make you go to church.
2. A beer is more likely to know how to spell "carburetor" than a woman.
3. A beer doesn't think baseball is stupid simply because the guys spit.
4. A beer doesn't give a [expletive deleted] if you keep a bunch of
other beers on the side.
5. A beer will not call you a sexist pig if you say "doberman" instead of
"doberperson".
6. A beer won't get a job as a DJ and play 5 straight hours of lesbian
folk music on yer fave radio station.
7. A beer understands why The Three Stooges are funny.
8. A beer won't raise a fuss about a little thing like leaving the
toilet seat up.
9. A beer doesn't think that a "three-hundred-fifty cubic-inch V8" is an
enormous can of vegetable juice.
10. A beer won't smoke in your car.
