Seeing a commotion in Harvard Square, a man strolled over and asked what
was going on. One of the onlookers explained to him that there was a Mooney
who had immersed himself in gasoline and was threatening to set fire to
himself to demonstrate his committment to the Rev. Moon. The man gasped and
asked what was being done to defuse the obviously dangerous situation.
"Well", replied the onlooker, "we're taking up a collection -- so
far I've got two Bics, four Zippos and eighteen books of matches."
A man who keeps stealing mopeds is an obvious cycle-path.
A man pleaded innocent of any wrong doing when caught by the police
during a raid at the home of a mobster, excusing himself by claiming that he
was making a bolt for the door....
