Related:

• The sex act is the funniest thing on the face of this Earth. -- Diana Rigg
• One dusty July afternoon, somewhere around the turn of the century, Patrick Malone was in Mulcahey's Bar, bending an elbow with the other street car conductors from the Brooklyn Traction Company.
  While they were discussing the merits of a local ring hero, the bar goes silent....
• Parades just bring out so many emotions in me! Joy, excitement, looking.
  .. -- Marge, letting herself go at a St. Patrick's Day parade, "Homer vs....
• A few weeks ago, I was a washed-up actor with a drinking problem.
  Then Brad Goodman came along and gave me this job and a can of fortified wine!...
• At about 2500 A.D., humankind discovers a computer problem that *must* be solved.
  The only difficulty is that the problem is NP complete and will take thousands of years even with the latest optical biologic technology available....
• She's a nice girl and all, but she's just a few sandwiches short of a good picnic. -- Ms. Opal
• Vet: Your dog's condition has been upgraded from stable to frisky, [SLH walks out with his hind legs in a cast on rollers] and he's free to go.
  His legs should be as good as new in a few months, but in the meantime he'll have to use the wheelabout....
• There was a nuclear war, a few years from now. This, all this, this whole place.
  Gone...Just ... gone....
• Sodom and Gomorrah! Wicked people destroyed by a tremendous conflagration, belching forth fire, hell, and brimstone from the heavens!
  Wicked people stooped to debaucheries, degeneracies, and perversion!...