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• This was life! Ah, how he loved it! Civilization held nothing like this in its narrow and circumscribed sphere, hemmed in by restrictions and conventionalities.
  Even clothes were a hindrance and a nuisance. At last he was free....
• THE OLD POOL SHOOTER had won many a game in his life.
  But now it was time to hang up the cue. When he did, all the other cues came crashing go the floor....
• Wizards are constantly subject to negative publicity.
  A case in point. One elderly wizard of my acquaintance, whenever he was bothered by unexpected guests, would immediately cast one of three spells upon them, either turning them to stone, transforming them into segmented worms, or blasting them entirely out of the kingdom....
• The world's most avid baseball fan (an Aggie) had arrived at the stadium for the first game of the World Series only to realize he had left his ticket at home.
  Not wanting to miss any of the first inning, he went to the ticket booth and got in a long line for another seat....
• And on the seventh day, while He was resting, He created snack cakes.
  And He saw that they looked good, and He did bite into one, at which time he realized that they tasted like something that had been sitting on a shelf wrapped in cheap plastic for decades....
• Once there was a marine biologist who loved dolphins.
  He spent his time trying to feed and protect his beloved creatures of the sea....
• FIB, n. A lie that has not cut its teeth. An habitual liar's nearest approach to truth
  he perigee of his eccentric orbit. When David said...
• After his Ignoble Disgrace, Satan was being expelled from Heaven.
  As he passed through the Gates, he paused a moment in thought, and turned to God and said, "A new creature called Man, I hear, is soon to be created....
• The old pool shooter has won many a game in his life.
  But now it was time to hang up the cue. When he did all the other cues came crashing to the floor....