Related:

• ELECTRICITY, n. The power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else.
  It is the same thing as lightning, and its famous attempt to strike Dr....
• YANKEE, n. In Europe, an American. In the Northern States of our Union, a New Englander.
  In the Southern States the word is unknown. (See DAMNYANK....
• Poker, n. A game said to be played with cards for some purpose to this lexicographer unknown.
  -- Ambrose Bierce "The Devil's Dictionary...
• MISDEMEANOR, n. An infraction of the law having less dignity than a felony and constituting no claim to admittance into the best criminal society.
  By misdemeanors he essays to climb Into the aristocracy of crime....
• HUSBAND, n. One who, having dined, is charged with the care of the plate.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• ALDERMAN, n. An ingenious criminal who covers his secret thieving with a pretence of open marauding.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• PATRIOTISM, n. Combustible rubbish read to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
  In Dr. Johnson's famous dictionary patriotism is defined as the last resort of a scoundrel....
• PLAUDITS, n. Coins with which the populace pays those who tickle and devour it.
  -- Ambrose Bierce, "The Devil's Dictionary...
• MOUSQUETAIRE, n. A long glove covering a part of the arm.
  Worn in New Jersey. But "mousquetaire" is a might poor way to spell muskeeter....