Related:

• How many alt.folklore.urban readers -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  One, to be dying of cancer and request that everybody around the world send him light bulbs so he can get into the Guinness Book of World Records....
• How many egotists -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  One. He holds onto the light bulb, and waits for the world to revolve around him....
• If you take a oriental and turn him around so he faces west, does he become disoriented?
• How many cops -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  Just one, but he is never around when you need him....
• How many Harvard/Oxford students -- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
  Just one. He grabs the bulb and waits for the world to revolve around him....
• Q: How many Bill Gateses does it take to change a light bulb?
  A: One. He puts the bulb in and lets the world revolve around him....
• How many schizophreniacs -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Well, he thinks it's five but as we all now it's only him, so......
• The willow which bends to the tempest, often escapes better than the oak which resists i
  and so in great calamities, it sometimes happens that light and frivolous spirits recover their elasticity and presence of mind sooner than those of a loftier character....
• How many Techno dancers -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Six, one to wear it around the neck, one to bring ecstasy and give it to the dancer to distract him, one to steal the light bulb while the dancer is distracted and dazed from ecstasy, three to distract the remaining crowd so they will not try to grab the bulb....