-- How many
alt.conspiracy readers
-- does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One to do it, one to insist that the CIA was responsible for
the old bulb burning out, one to blame it on the Illuminati,
one to blame the TLC/CFR/Bilderberg group, and Steve Crocker
to say that Lyndon LaRouche predicted the bulb would someday
burn out whereas the British-dominated establishment was
telling us the bulbs would never need to be replaced, Ted
Frank to tell everyone they're full of it, and several other
people to insist that Ted is a member of the CFR.
Related:
How many
Reaganists
-- does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten: One to deny that the bulb is burned out, one to clarify
the denial ("The bulb is really just dim"), one to blame the
bulb burning out on the Carter administration, one to blame the
bulb burning out on Congress, one to ask for a Constitutional
amendment that will prohibit bulbs from burning out, one to
replace the bulb with a kerosene lamp, one to borrow money from
the Japanese to pay for the kerosene, one former Reaganist to
lobby his old colleagues for a special favour for the kerosene
importer, one to cash the cheque for investing in the kerosene
importer, one to send the bill to the next generation....
How many
Kennedy assassination conspiracy theorists does it take
to screw in a light bulb?
15-One to screw it in, five to say he acted alone, one to say
that someone hidden in the ceiling helped, one to film it,
one to do an intense examination of the film and conclude
that a) it was tampered with and b) it proves that the first
screwer did not act alone, one to insist that the bulb was
altered after it was unscrewed, three tramps to walk across
the room an hour later, one to insist LBJ really screwed the
bulb in, and one to accuse all the others of being
disinformation specialists....
