Related:

• Homer: Now, what is a wedding? Well, Webster's Dictionary describes a wedding as, "The process of removing weeds from one's garden.
  [everyone groans] Moe: Tell us more about you and Marge!...
• Woman 1: [to Woman 2] This cross-country flight from the law would be hell if we didn't stick together.
  Woman 2: Hey: friends _stick_ together. Woman 3...
• Abe: That's _my_ ambulance. I called for it four hours ago.
  Homer: Marge, how did you know -- Marge: That the pants would rip?...
• Homer: Dad! Abe: Son! Homer: I'm a screw-up. I burned down our house.
  Abe: No, I'm a screw-up. _I_ burned down our house....
• Homer: Now that we're all alone, Marge, admit it: you like Lisa best!
  Marge: No! Homer: Oh, so you're a Bart woman, are you?...
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Lisa: [over the strains of the Battle Hymn of the Republic] [sees the Lincoln Memorial in the reflecting pool] Honest Abe, he'll show me the way.
  [goes to the memorial] Mr. Lincoln?...
• Moe: Hey, uh, I got an idea: we can play a game to pass the time.
  Er, I'll make the sound of a barnyard animal, and, er, you all try to guess what it is....
• Abe: That's the activity room. We're not allowed in there.
  That's the library. Not allowed in there either....