Related:

• Bart: Dad, do I have to brush my teeth? Homer: No, but at least rinse your mouth out with soda.
  [Bart opens a can and gargles with it] -- Only three cavities?...
• Homer: Aw, I don't know how to punish you. What does Marge usually do?
  Bart: She makes me taste beer. Homer: Come on, boy, give your old man a little credit....
• Marge: So, Twiggy, I hear you and your husband, Woody, just had a baby.
  What did you name him? "Twiggy": Chip. [Rim shot....
• Jacques: First, you must get to know your lane. Feel the slickness, feel the slippery finish.
  Caresses it, experience it. Quite smooth, isn't it?...
• Homer: Marge? Since I'm not talking to Lisa, would you please ask her to pass me the syrup?
  Marge: [Wearily] Dear, please pass your father the syrup, Lisa....
• Lisa: [spraying the Christmas tree] Mom, this fake snow is making me dizzy.
  Marge: We're almost finished. There's just a little bit of green left....
• Homer: [gasps, then realizes] Oh, it's Bart. I can't believe it.
  I'm being mocked. By my own children. On my birthday....
• Homer: A whole week of just father and son. See you at dinner.
  [both walk off whistling] Bart: What time?...
• Homer: So, I realized that being with my family is more important than being cool.
  Bart: Dad, what you just said was powerfully uncool....