Related:

• Rabbi K: [answers phone] What? Saul Bellow? The Nobel-prize-winning Jewish novelist?
  He wants to have lunch with me? Ha ha! It's a date!...
• Lisa: Excuse us, Rabbi Krustofsky? Rabbi K: Oh, what can I do for you, my young friend?
  Bart: We came to talk to you about your son. Rabbi K...
• Man 1: Should I finish college? Rabbi K: Yes. No one is poor except he who lacks knowledge.
  Woman: [babe in arms] Rabbi, should I have another child?...
• Rabbi K: [answering the phone] Hello. Hello? Anybody there?
  What's this, I hear the phone ring, and suddenly there's nothing....
• Rabbi K: Hello? Anybody there? I hear breathing but I don't hear talking.
  What's going on here? Hello, mister? Hello, hello?...
• Rabbi Krustofsky: If you were a musician or a jazz singer, this I could forgive.
  The plot of this episode is the Rabbi disowning his son (Krusty the Clown) because he became an entertainer rather than becoming a Rabbi....
• My name isn't Krusty the Klown. It's Herschel Krustofsky.
  My father was a rabbi. <His> father was a rabbi....
• Rabbi K: You know that my son Herschel was first in his yeshiva class?
  As a matter of fact, he was voted `The most likely to hear God'....
• Krusty: [humming the Marseillaise] Um, could you direct me to President Francois Mitterand's table?
  Waitress: You think you're funny? Krusty: Fifty million Frenchmen can't be wrong!...