Related:

• Krusty: Hey, hey! Hoo-huh-huh-ha-ha! Homer: [gags] Krusty
  What's the matter. Oh, yeah, my grotesque appearance!...
• Clerk: Now before we give you health insurance, I have to ask you a few questions.
  Homer: Questions! Questions! My whole scheme down the -- [realizes] I mean ask away....
• Emcee: And now, to help introduce our fantastic new burger -- the one with ketchup -- here he is, coming in by parachute
  Krusty the Klown! [sound of Homer yelling, getting rapidly louder] [he smashes through the hamburger display...
• Oh, no. What if they botch it? I won't have a dad-- for awhile.
  -- Bart realizes Homer needs a coronary bypass, "Homer's Triple Bypa...
• How many talk show hosts -- does it take to change a light bulb?
  Three, one to screw in the new bulb, one to ask the old one how it feels to be replaced, and one to take questions from the audience....
• kids laughs at Itchy and Scratchy] Marge: How many times can you laugh at that cat getting hit by the moon?
  Bart: It's a _new_ episode. Lisa: Not exactly......
• Dear God, thank you for Ziggy comics, little baby ducks and Sweating to the Oldies volumes One, Two and Four.
  -- Ned Flanders prays, "Homer's Triple Bypa...
• Yes, I've now got this nice little apartment in New York, one of those L-shaped ones.
  Unfortunately, it's a lower case l. -- Rita Rudne...
• Jay: Welcome to "Coming Attractions". I'm your host, Jay Sherman, thank you.
  Tonight, we review an aging Charles Bronson in "Death Wish 9"....