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Yes, Harvard, Yale, MIT, Oxford, The Sorbonne, the Louvre [pron.
Loove-rah]. -- Lionel Hutz, attorney at law, listing his degrees, "Bart Gets Hit by a Ca...
Mr. Simpson, the state bar forbids me from promising you a big cash settlement.
But just between you and me, I promise you a big cash settlement....
You'll be getting more than just a lawyer, Mr. Simpson.
You'll also be getting this exquisite faux pearl necklace, a $...
Just look at the X-rays! You see that dark spot there?
Whiplash. And this smudge here, that looks like my fingerprint?...
With all due respect, Mrs. Simpson, you're not a doctor, the boy's not a doctor, the only person who even comes CLOSE is this man [Nick Riviera].
-- Lionel Hutz responding to Marge's skepticism, ...
Hutz: Doctor, are you sure there isn't a little soft tissue trauma in the facial area?
Riviera: Oh yeah, tons of it! [wrapping Bart's head] Just say when!...
I should be able to run over as many kids as I want!
-- In court, Mr. Burns justifies his actions, "Bart Gets Hit by a Ca...
Judge: Mr. Burns, I must warn you that if you continue to disrupt the court in this way, I will have to cite you for contempt.
Burns: You wouldn't dare! Judge: Well, no, um, I guess I wouldn't....
Judge: Hello, Bart. Now, you do understand the difference between telling the truth and telling a lie, don't you son?
Bart: Maybe. Judge: Uh huh. Well, you wouldn't lie to the United State...
Defenseless child at three o'clock.
-- Smithers spying a helpless Bart in the street, "Bart Gets Hit by a Ca...
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