The Simpsons

Home › Fortune Cookies › The Simpsons

Hello, cook? Sorry to bother you so late, but I got a hankering for some.
.. That's right. Don't forget the applesauce! -- Homer, on the phone late at night, "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?...
Herbert: And I want to pay you $200,000 a year! Home
And I want to let you! -- hiring Homer as a consultant, "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?...
Herbert: Hey Homer, how's your car coming? Homer: Oh, fine.
They were putting in an onboard something-or-other and rack-and-peanut steering....
Herbert: Do you understand? Homer: Sort of. Herbe
Homer? Homer: What. Herbert: Answer me again with self-confidence!...
Some things are so snazzy they never go out of style!
Like tail fins... And bubble domes... And shag carpeting....
Hang up, call me back, and say the exact opposite of everything you just said.
-- Herbert, to his advisor, "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?...
I want a horn here, here, and here. You can never find a horn when you're mad.
And they should all play `La Cucaracha'. -- Homer, designing a car, "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?...
Advisor: What about a separate soundproof bubble-dome for the kids with optional restraints and muzzles?
Homer: Bullseye! -- designing a car, "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?...
Lisa: The mouse is named Itchy and the cat is named Scratchy.
Bart: They hate each other. Lisa: And they're not shy about expressing it....
To think I wasted my life in boardrooms, and stockholders meetings, when I could've been watching cartoons!
-- Herbert Powell, watching `Itchy and Scratchy' "Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?...

< previous

444

445
446
447
448
449
450
451
452
453
654
next >