The Simpsons

The Simpsons

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Bart: Oy! This guy's tough. Lisa: Bart, we're going to have to outsmart him.
Bart: I dunno, he's pretty sharp. He saw right through this disguise....
Rabbi K: [answers phone] What? Saul Bellow? The Nobel-prize-winning Jewish novelist?
He wants to have lunch with me? Ha ha! It's a date!...
Waitress: And for you, sir? Rabbi K: Ah, let's see.
I want a nice sandwich. But the Joey Bishop, eh, too fatty....
Krusty: [humming the Marseillaise] Um, could you direct me to President Francois Mitterand's table?
Waitress: You think you're funny? Krusty: Fifty million Frenchmen can't be wrong! ...
Lisa: Bart, we've been going about this all wrong. What's the one thing rabbis prize above everything else?
Bart: Those stupid hats? -- "Like Father, Like Clow...
We're going to hit him where it hurts. Right in the Judaica.
-- Lisa Simpson on Rabbi Krustofsky, "Like Father, Like Clow...
Agugugug. Glug glug glug. `Oh, Noah, Noah! Save us!
Save us!' `No!' -- Bart plays with a biblical pop-up book, "Like Father, Like Clow...
Bart: At all times, let a man be supple as a reed and not rigid as a cedar.
Others: Ah, mm. [general murmers of appreciation] Rabbi K...
Lisa: [tired] Here you go, Bart. It's a longshot, but that's all I can do without learning ancient Hebrew.
Bart: [stares at her] Lisa: Bart! I am <not> going to learn ancient Hebrew!! ...
Moe: [moved to tears] I got something in my eye.
.. Barney: Here, take my hankie. Moe: [sees Barney's filthy handkerchief] Agh!...

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