The Simpsons

The Simpsons

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Lisa: Hi, Alison, I'm Lisa Simpson. Oh, it's great to finally meet someone who converses above the normal eight-year-old level.
Alison: Actually, I'm seven. I was just skipped ahead because...
Lisa: Gee, I never met anyone who's skipped a grade before.
Alison: I'm surprised you haven't been skipped. You're obviously smart enough....
Lisa: Well, I gotta go. I have to practice for band auditions.
Alison: Me too! Hey, what instrument do you play?...
Bart: Hurry up and finish eating! Homer: You're steering fine, boy.
Hard to the right! Bart: Oh! Homer: Hard to the left!...
Bart: Dad, isn't this stealing? Homer: Read your town charter, boy.
If foodstuff should touch the ground, said foodstuff shall be turned over to the village idiot....
Marge: [sighs dreamily] Lisa: Mom? Marge: What? What?
Lisa: Why am I still rotting away in the second grade instead of being skipped ahead?...
Marge: Homer, I really appreciate you making dinner, but this food tastes a little strange.
Lisa: It hurts my teeth. Homer: That's because I've loaded it with sugar!...
Largo: It's your turn, Jimbo. Jimbo: [steps up with tambourine, hits it once] Unh!
Largo: Hmm, someone's been practicing over the summer....
Lisa: [opening her eyes] Largo: Oh! That was a close one, Lisa, but you made it.
Lisa: [happy] I won first chair? Largo: No, you regained consciousness....
Lisa: I need help, Mom. There's another girl at school who's smarter, younger, and a better sax player than me.
Ew, I feel so average. Marge: Well, you'll always be number one to me -- Ba...

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