Related:

• If you are a burgler, then we are probably at home but can't come to the phone right now Otherwise, we probably aren't at home.
• Voice Mail My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.
  A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here....
• The Canonical List of Telephone Answering Machine Messages "Hi!
  I don't exist at the moment, but if you leave your message, name and number, I'll call you back when I am....
• W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l
  < -if you have to ask get out of the way- Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the window, and smash your face into the front fender?...
• The message I currently have on my recorder is the output from my Amiga's speech sythesizer.
  It's set up as a dialog between two distict, but recognizably artificial voices....
• Hello. I'm home right now but cannot find the phone.
  Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it....
• Theme from "Indiana Jones" in the background.] You've reached the residence of John and Tom.
  We can't come to the phone right now, because we're cleaning the refrigerator....
• Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like.
  Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you....
• Letter from Camp Dear Mom & Dad: We are having a great time here at Lake Typhoid.
  Scoutmaster Webb is making us all write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and worried....