Related:

• Paddy was trapped in a bog and seemed a goner when Big Mick O'Reilly wandered by.
  "Help!" Paddy shouted, "Oi'm sinkin'!" Don't worry," assured Mick....
• Tim Shandy stepped into the Warm Spoon, a popular Galway tavern.
  To Mike Callahan, the barkeep, Shandy said "Mike, I'll be havin' three whiskeys....
• The following are actual stories told by travel agents (and you wonder why US citizens generally score less than the rest of the world on geography).
  .. I had someone who wanted to stay at the Bob Newhart Inn in Connecticut....
• The following are actual stories told by travellers from Mendocino County, CA to travel agents in the UK.
  (And you wonder why US citizens generally score less than the rest of the world on geography....
• Tim Kelly was walking therough a dim passageway when someone spoke to him.
  "Good evenin', Kelly," said the muffled figure. "Don't ye be knowin' your old friend Grogan any more?...
• How about that footage on the news yesterday of our new Commander-in- Chief on the deck of the aircraft carrier (Teddy Roosevelt?
  ).. After throwing one of his snappy salutes (he's *almost* got that down), I half expected him to give the order, "Let's turn this thang around....