Department of the Treasury
Internal Revenue Service
Washington, D.C.
To: All Male Taxpayers
RE: Notice of increase of tax payment
Form 1040 - P
The only thing that the IRS has not taxed yet is your penis. This is
due to the fact that 40% of the time it is hanging
around unemployed, 30% of the time it is pissed off, 20% of the time
it is hard up, and 10% of the time it is in the hole.
On top of this, it has two dependents and both are nuts.
Accordingly, as of April 1, 1998, your penis will be taxed according
to size. To determine your category, please consult
the chart below and confirm this informatin on page 2, section 7, line
3, on the Standard Form 1040.
10-16 inches Luxury Tax $50.00
8-10 inches Pole Tax $30.00
5-8 inches Privilege Tax $15.00
4-5 inches Nuisance Tax $5.00
Please note: Anyone under 4 inches is eligible for a refund. Please
do not ask for an extension!!!!!!
Additionally, males exceeding 12 inches must file under Capital Gains.
Sincerely,
Peter Checker
Internal Revenue Service
