How to keep a healthy level of insanity while driving other
people crazy...
** At lunch time, sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer at passing
cars to see if they slow down.
** Page yourself over the intercom. (don't disguise your voice).
** Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Always
wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if
your boss is the opposite gender.)
** Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them what you're doing.
For example: "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."
** Put mosquito netting around your cubicle.
** Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with
that.
** Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair
dancing.
** Put your garbage can on your desk and label it 'IN'.
** Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
** Send e-mail messages that advertise free pizza, doughnuts, etc., in the
break room. When people complain that there was nothing there, lean back,
rub your stomach, and say, "You've got to be faster than that."
** Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone has gotten
over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
** Reply to everything someone says with, "That's what you think."
** Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."
** Adjust the tint on your monitor so that the brightness level lights up
the entire working area. Insist to others that you like it way.
** Dont use any punctuation
** As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
** Ask people what sex they are.
** Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
** Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
** Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party
because you're not in the mood.
*** AND the final way to annoy people:
** Send this e-mail to everyone in your address book, even if they sent it
to you or have asked you not to send them stuff like this.
YOUR CO-WORKER COULD BE A SPACE ALIEN, SAY EXPERTS . .. here's how you can
tell (by Michael Cassels of the "National Inquirer")
Many Americans work side by side with space aliens who look human -
but you can spot these visitors byy looking for certain
tip-offs, say experts....
