The Plan
In The Beginning Was THE PLAN And Then Came The Assumptions,
And The Assumptions Were Without Form, And THE PLAN Was Completely
Without Substance
The Plan
In the beginning was THE PLAN and then came the assumptions,
and the assumptions were without form, and THE PLAN was completely
without substance; and the darkness was upon the face of the
employees, and they spoke amongst themselves saying: "it is a crock
of shit and it stinks!" and the employees went unto their supervisors,
saying: "it is a pail of dung and none may abide the odor thereof,"
and the Supervisors went unto the Managers, saying: "it is a container
of excrement and it is very strong, such that none may abide by it," and
the Managers went unto their Division Managers saying: "it is a
vessel of fertilizer and none may abide its strength," and the Division
Managers went unto their System Managers saying: "it contains that which
aids plant groth and it is very strong," and the System Managers went
unto the General Manager saying: "it promotes growth and is very
powerful," and the General Manager went unto the Board saying: "this
plan will actively promote the growth and efficiency of this organization,"
and the Board looked upon THE PLAN and said that it was good and
THE PLAN became policy! This is how shit happens!
Three women applied to a brokerage house for a single position. The
manager decided that since their qualifications all appeared to be
equivalent, he would give them each $5000 and let them take a month to
do some investing.
At the end of the month, one woman had doubled her $5000, one had
broken even, and one had lost the entire amount. Which one did the
manager hire?
The one with the biggest tits, of course.
This whole affair involving judge Thomas is not exactly what I'd call
practicing safe sex --
Thomas should have known beter than to mess with aides.
Here lies Les Moore
Four slugs from a .44
No Les
No Moore
On the tombstone ---------
1) Of a swimmer
Saw four sharks,
Off the coast.
Three he missed,
One almost.
2) Tight Rope Walker
Used no net,
Knew no fear.
Made mis-step,
Wound up here.
3) Novice farmer
Here lies Clyde,
Whose life was full.
Until he tried,
To milk a bull.
The poor ol' guy had a corkscrew prick,
He spent his life on a ceaseless hunt,
Looking for a girl with a corkscrew c___,
But alas, alack, now he is dead,
For the girl that he found, had a left hand thread.
Top Ten recently-developed weapons to be used in an upcoming strike
against the headquarters of Saddam Hussein:
10. Tammy-Faye Baker's make-up collection
9. The Florida State Football team (As long as they kick U of M's butt)
8. Soap
7. Half of the lawyers from the State of New York
6. The ever-popular Saddamizor (The Sodomizer has been developed by Iraq)
5. Red Tape
4. Delta Airlines
3. Geraldo Rivera's new book...gives detailed inside information
2. A planeload of REAL Berets
1. Plan Alpha Gamma: <CLASSIFIED>
