Related:

• When a lawyer tells his clients he has a sliding fee schedule what he means is that after he bills you it's financially hard to get back on your feet.
• Once upon a time a sailor ran into his doctor's office and begged him for help.
  He pulled down his pants and showed the doctor his dick, which was sporting a ruby red ring around the tip....
• Keeping Busy... A newly married sailor was informed by the Navy that he was going to be stationed a long way from home on a remote island in the Pacific for a year.
  A few weeks after he got there he began to miss his new wife, so he wrote her a letter....
• During a recess in the proceedings, three delegates to an international agriculture convention sat down for cocktails, and before long, they began to discuss methods for driving their wives wild.
  The French delegate volunteered that he always picked a few roses from the garden, spread the petals on his wife's body, then gently blew them off before making love....
• A male-to-female transexual was recently interviewed on a radio talk show.
  The DJ asked the transexual about what, if any, pain the person experienced during the operation....
• A Frenchman, an Englishman, a Texan, and a Mexican are flying in a plane.
  The pilot explains to her passengers that the plane is too heavy and in order to avoid an ugly crash, some weight needs to be removed from the plane....
• At the time of the Falkland Islands war, it was said that the invading British force was the first army in history to go ashore wearing hip boots.
• W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l
  < -if you have to ask get out of the way- Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the window, and smash your face into the front fender?...