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• 182 There was a young fellow named Kimble Whose prick was exceedingly nimble, But fragile and slender, And dainty and tender, So he kept it encased in a thimble.
• There was an old man of the port Whose prick was remarkably short.
  When he got into bed, The old woman said, "This isn't a prick; it's a wart!...
• 144 There was an old man of Connaught Whose prick was remarkably short.
  When he got into bed The old woman said, "This isn't a prick, it's a wart....
• Said a lecherous fellow named Shea, When his prick wouldn't rise for a lay, "You must seize it, and squeeze it, And tease it, and please it, For Rome wasn`t built in a day.
• 94 Said a lecherous fellow named Shea, When his prick wouldn't rise for a lay
  "You must sieze it, and squeeze it, And tease it, and please it, For Rome wasn't built in a day....
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• Once upon a time there was a sperm named Stanley who lived inside a famous movie actor.
  Stanley was a very healthy sperm. He'd do pushups and somersaults and limber himself up all the time, while the other sperm just lay around on their fat asses not doing a thing....
• How about that footage on the news yesterday of our new Commander-in- Chief on the deck of the aircraft carrier (Teddy Roosevelt?
  ).. After throwing one of his snappy salutes (he's *almost* got that down), I half expected him to give the order, "Let's turn this thang around....