Related:

• Two Texans are standing on a bridge bragging about their manliness, when they decide to piss into the river below.
  After commencing, they continue bragging: Texan 1...
• Two guys stop on a bridge to relieve themselves. As they are standing there, the first guy said "Hey, this water is cold.
  The other guy replied, "Yeah, and deep too....
• During a picnic for upscale lawyers in Sausalito, Biff and Skippy had had an ounce or two too much and decided to walk back into San Francisco.
  After five minutes, each began to argue about whose dick was the longest....
• Two vain men are peeing by a river and one says, "Gee, this water's cold.
  The second says, "and deep!...
• Soon After The Invention of the Thermos... One day Ken is sitting in his house when the doorbell unexpectedly rings.
  He answers the door and finds a salesman standing on his porch with a strange object....
• A Frenchman, an Englishman, a Texan, and a Mexican are flying in a plane.
  The pilot explains to her passengers that the plane is too heavy and in order to avoid an ugly crash, some weight needs to be removed from the plane....
• A 5-year-old girl gets a kitten for her birthday. Soon thereafter, the Mom, while getting into the car slams the door on the kitten, killing it in front of her daughter.
  Mom explains that "this is life", accidents happen, we learn from our mistakes, and so on....
• This Texan goes to Hawaii for vacation. The first place they go is a beach.
  The Texan says, "Well yaknow, this is really a pretty beach, but it aint no big deal....
• At a football game two Texans were seated behind two nuns.
  One Texan said to his friend, "I can't wait to get back to Dallas....