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• 12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS (CAJUN STYLE) Day 1: Dear Boudreaux, Thanks for de bird in de Pear tree.
  I fix it las' night with dirty rice. I doan tink de pear tree will grow in deswamp, so I swap it for a Satsuma....
• Have you spoken to a Turing machine today?
• I Like 'em Dead I was just 13 when my mommy caught me French-kissing a cadaver in my bed.
  She said, "Son, how could you do this?" And I said "Mom, I like 'em dead....
• PAINT IT LIKE A COW The Fair. I hadn’t been to one of these
  “regional events, held annually, consisting of farm and home product displays, and various competitions and entertainments,” since childhood....
• The Canonical List of Telephone Answering Machine Messages "Hi!
  I don't exist at the moment, but if you leave your message, name and number, I'll call you back when I am....
• The Complete Set Of Blonde Jokes ----------------------------------- 12/15/92 Q
  How do blonde braincells die ? A: Alone....
• cars and driving --- For a while I didn't have a car.
  .. I had a helicopter... no place to park it, so I just tied it to a lamp post and left it running....
• Here are some of my favorite jokes from the HBO special Jackie Mason On Broadway.
  Keep in mind that Jackie is a former rabbi. His father and two brothers are also rabbis....
• ALIEN ZOMBIE & THE CONGO LIZARDS You’re in luck. As my luck would have it, I made my bones in a musical family.
  Grandpop slapped ivories at the Congo, and Daddy-O moonlit his rocket ‘88 in the lizard lounges....