Related:

• Straight Out Of The Eighties... This will only make sense to those of us who had the dubious distinction of being children of the eighties, or listened to music on a regular basis.
  If you were "there", then you will understand.... I was working part time in a five and dime....
• My mother-in-law kept nagging me to take her to Sea World. I called, but they don't want her.
• HELP ME! MY BRAIN!!! I JUST DROPPED IT! AAARRGGGGHHH!
• First Date Advice Things Not To Say On A First Date
  1. "This is my apartment, but don't break anything, or you'll have to pay for it....
• elephones --- I saw a close friend of mine the other day.
  .. He said, "Stephen, why haven't you called me?" I said, "I can't call everyone I want....
• I can't help it, it's my nature.
• I will make my day!
• My mother made me a whore. (to which someone else added) If I give her the yarn, will she make me one too?
• My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby.
  Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments....