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• I was driving through North Wales one day last summer, when I had the misfortune to run out of petrol right out in the sticks.
  It was about 5 miles to the nearest house, but when I got there the farmer who lived in it was very hospitable and offered to drive me back to my car with a can of petrol, as long as I stayed to have a bite to eat first....
• A guy walks into a pub with a pig under his arm, and this pig has a wooden leg.
  The guy orders a beer for himself, and a dish of water for the pig....
• The Poles have a saying about how communist governments rewrite history
  "Only the future is certain; the past is always changing" A would-be bandit failed because he had written a holdup up note on another bank's withdrawal slip....
• W H Y C O P S H A T E Y O U <<<<&l
  < -if you have to ask get out of the way- Have you ever been stopped by a traffic cop and, while he was writing a ticket or giving you a warning, you got the feeling that he would just love to yank you out of the car, right through the window, and smash your face into the front fender?...
• The Wizard of Zone Once upon a time in Depression-era Kansas there was a little black boy named Zachary X (pronounced "ex" not "ten") who lived on a farm.
  He was an orphan, a cheap device to garner your sympathy....
• 100 Ways to Confuse Your Roommate 1. Insist that you are a vegetarian and protest anytime your roommate eats meat.
  Then leave "Slim Jim" wrappers on the floor and lie on the bed holding your stomach everytime your roommate walks in....
• Slow Down... A farmer lived on a quiet rural highway.
  But, as time went by, the traffic slowly built up at an alarming rate....
• This is a true story told by a friend of mine. It happened to a girl she knew.
  There was this girl driving along the highway, when she suddely had to visit the restroom....
• Two Polacks are drving along in their truck when the y see a pig by the side of the road.
  Well, this is pretty unusual, so they stop for a look....