Miscellaneous Jokes

Miscellaneous Jokes

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Mikhail Gorbachev woke up one morning feeling great.
He walked to his window, saw the sun coming up and crowed, "Good morning, sun!...
Make it a double, Joe," the dejected man told the bartender.
I just got the shock of my life. I caught my wife screwing my best friend....
The Ideal Wife should be beautiful, but not so beautiful that people think you married her only for her beauty.
And The Ideal Wife should be wealthy, but not so wealthy that people think you marrie...
A man went into the proctologist's office for his first exam.
The doctor told him to have a seat in the examination room and that he would be with him in just a few minutes....
A young woman buys a mirror at an antique shop, and hangs it on her bathroom door.
This guy has been sitting in a bar all night, staring at a girl wearing the tightest pants he's ever seen.
Finally his curiosity gets the best of him, so he walks over and asks: "How do you get i...
The gang was hanging out at the local bar one day when in walked an attractive young lady.
She goes up to the bar and orders a shot of whiskey....
A guy in a restaurant says to the waitress "I want a cup of coffee without cream.
The waitress comes back a few minutes later and says "I'm sorry, but we're all out of cream....
Two guys go into a small diner for breakfast, the waitress comes up and asks for their order.
I'll have two eggs over easy, toast, and juice." the first man says....
A young black couple are watching TV when their child speaks for the first time, saying "MOTHER".
With excitement, the father exclaims "Did you hear that honey? Our son just said half a word!"....

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