Related:

• One day St. Peter had to go on some very important business, so he left a minor saint in charge of the Pearly Gates and instructed him to get proof of identity before he let anyone in.
  So the minor saint was sitting around when Beethoven arrived....
• There were these two strings walking down the road when they came to a bar.
  They decided to stop in and have a few drinks. So they sat down at a table and noticed that they were not going to be served....
• Einstein dies and goes to heaven only to be informed that his room is not yet ready.
  I hope you will not mind waiting in a dormitory....
• Proof By Intimidation ----- -- ------------ A Horse has an infinite number of legs.
  A horse has two legs in back and forelegs in front....
• St. Peter is doing his usual thing in heaven (this is a genre in itself) and Salvador Dali appears at the Pearly Gates.
  St. Peter says, "Your name please?" and Dali gives his name and Pete says, "I see that your name is listed, do you have any ID?...
• There once was an career aggie who was well into his 12th year at A&M.
  His father, an arch-supporting alumni, was growing tired of his son not having graduated yet....
• RACIAL/ETHNIC There were these two men drinking together in a bar.
  One was of Chinese extraction, the other Jewish....
• The Poles have a saying about how communist governments rewrite history
  "Only the future is certain; the past is always changing" A would-be bandit failed because he had written a holdup up note on another bank's withdrawal slip....
• There was this young boy coming of age and his father wanted to show him the facts of life.
  So he gave him 20 bucks and sent him down to the local brothel to have a good time....