Related:

• If you can't keep up, DRAG 'em down to your level.
• I Like 'em Dead I was just 13 when my mommy caught me French-kissing a cadaver in my bed.
  She said, "Son, how could you do this?" And I said "Mom, I like 'em dead....
• The 3 Kick Rule: A big-city, California, lawyer went duck hunting in rural Colorado.
  He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence....
• 52 There were three ladies of Huxham, And whenever we meets 'em we fucks 'em
  And when that game grows stale We sits on a rail, And pulls out our pricks and they sucks 'em....
• HAVE A MICROSOFT CHRISTMAS 'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house Not a creature was stirring, except father's mouse.
  The computer was humming, the icons were hopping, As father did last-minute Internet shopping....
• EEKING OUT A LIVING IN RADIOACTIVE SHOES Come now, don’t any of you baby boomers remember having your childhood feet x-rayed at the shoe store?
  It was right about the time we were being stuffed with megadoses of penicillin no matter what the wheezy etiology, and ducking for cover under one-armed elementary school desks in mock nuclear bomb attacks....
• Ok, then there's another song, then it comes back with just acoustic guitar and about 7,000,000 people singing.
  .. I Like 'em Dead (reprise) (He likes 'em dead) You kill 'em I'll grill 'em (He likes 'em dead) You hang 'em I'll bang 'em (He likes 'em dead) You impale 'em I'll nail 'em You can bet as long as I'm around You'll never bury a virgin in the ground....
• A 5-year-old Lebanese girl, Re Mi Bendaly, is gaining fame singing anti-war ballads.
  It's what you get when you ask, "Want to make some dough, Re Mi?...
• Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her when she was bad?
  A: They re-arranged the furniture in her room....