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• Life is a game. Money is how we keep score.
• On the cellphone pad of life, always keep one finger on the disconnect key.
• A Little Poem Regarding Computer Spell Checkers... Eye halve a spelling chequer It came with my pea sea It plainly marques four my revue Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.
  Eye strike a key and type a word And weight four it two say Weather eye am wrong oar write It shows me strait a weigh....
• My Computer Now Has A Spell Check... Eye halve a spelling chequer It came with my pea sea It plainly Marx four my revue Miss steaks eye can knot sea.
  Eye strike quay and type a word. And weight four it two say Weather I eye am wrong oar write It shows me strait a weigh....
• Ways to Annoy Others 1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
  2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage"....
• Letter carriers, who normally must keep a wary eye out for nasty dogs, now also must avoid being set upon by packs of wild youngsters awaiting Michael Jackson tickets.
• Hold tight, we're in for nasty weather.
• The Painter There was this world famous painter. In the prime of her career, she started losing her eyesight.
  Fearful that she might lose her life as a painter, she went to see the best eye surgeon in the world....